(no subject)

Friday, 22 September 2017 03:14
apprehensiveacolyte: (cass)
[personal profile] apprehensiveacolyte
So, we've figured out a possible way to rehabilitate our new arrival (read: keep her from trying to restart the Rapture Family 2.0, which she clearly stated she has every intention of doing. Seriously, it's taking the combined strength of me, SV, and R. Prydonius to restrain her from doing so.) Apparently she's pretty musically inclined. She's been collaborating with me on a few of the tracks that are going on the next album.

I just wish that I could actually, you know, credit her (or any of my other systemmates) in the liner notes and still be taken seriously. The people in the Bioshock fandom chat server I run know I make music, if they see "Sofia Lamb" credited as a collaborator on any of my tracks they'll think I'm crazy. Which, okay, that's not really up for debate (anyone society doesn't like is given that label eventually) but the point still stands.This is the problem with sharing mental space with people who most of the world thinks are purely inventions of fiction.

-Cass

(no subject)

Wednesday, 20 September 2017 16:59
octomantra: (Default)
[personal profile] octomantra
TW mental illness and stuff about therapy

Read more... )
lb_lee: A happy little brain with a bandage on it, surrounded by a circle and the words LB Lee. (Default)
[personal profile] lb_lee
There is a chestnut of misinformation on tumblr claiming that 'system' is a term made by DID folks, for DID folks, and nobody else is allowed to use it.  This is often wrapped up in the idea that multiplicity is owned by people with DID/DDNOS/OSDD, and anyone else claiming it is appropriating.  This is utter nonsense.  I've written numerous posts on this before, but here is the more thorough breakdown, first focused on the politics of this statement, and then the actual facts of reality.

The Politics: why this argument doesn't make sense, even under its own logic. )

The Facts: twenty-plus years of non-DID multiples using 'system.' )

Changing our Internet Usage

Sunday, 17 September 2017 12:33
lb_lee: A picture of Sneak smiling (sneak)
[personal profile] lb_lee
Hello!  It's Sneak!  I was thinking about an article that [personal profile] metahacker linked, this one about designing sites addictively.  And it's made me get on board with Mac and Biff's idea about changing how we interact with the Internet!

Namely: we will be deleting our Facebook, and drastically cutting down our tumblr time (if not ending it entirely).

But my reasons for it aren't the same as theirs.  Biff just doesn't like the Internet in general, and Mac noticed that it wasn't making us happy.  Rogan has said he finds internet stuff increasingly overwhelming, and I think I know why: the newer generation of social media sites are designed for constant interaction.

We grew up in an older Internet time, where you weren't expected to be online every day.  You could take a break for a week, and quickly catch up, no problem!  Forums, DeviantArt, Livejournal, all of these sites are (or were) not intended to be used multiple times a day, every day. (Unless you're a HARDCORE user.) The sites were also designed for specific things: to make posts, or put up art.  They weren't expected to be everything for everyone, and while DeviantArt had forums and chatrooms, you could do perfectly fine without them. (And I don't think the chatrooms were there when we first joined.)

However, as time has gone on and more folks are on the Internet more often, these sites have changed their design philosophy.  Instead of being made for folks to interact maybe a few times a week, they're now made to be posted on multiple times a day for long stretches.  They're also more generalized.  For instance, Facebook was originally intended for folks applying for college, or in college; now it's used to organize offline events and work engagements, catch up with people from your past, and have heated political arguments.  It has groups, events, chats, games, individual pages, all with very questionable security and ethics, and they sell the information for profit.

I don't think it's paranoid to say that a site like Facebook designs itself to be as omnipresent as possible so they can get as much information (and therefore as much profit) as they can from their users!  But I can say that it makes the site not a lot of fun to be on, for us anyway.  Even the nicest site in the world would get overwhelming and tiresome when you're encouraged to be there all the time!  And by trying to be everything for everyone, their designs tend to fall apart, because they're trying to do so many things at the same time.  So it becomes awfully byzantine (in the case of Facebook) or just plain incoherent and broken (like tumblr)!

Arguments and conflict happen on every website.  But when a site is designed to be used all the time, the rate of interaction as high as possible, then it means that instead of seeing conflict maybe once a month, you see it all the time, and that's its own kind of draining!  On the whole, I think that we are just not able to keep up with sites like that, and that it's bad for our health to try.

In other words, it's time to refocus our online energy to websites that are designed for fewer, more specific interactions!  Therefore, I personally vote in agreement for deleting our Facebook, continuing our low/no tumblr usage, and refocusing our attention on sites like Dreamwidth.

--Sneak

Queer Crip Pride shirts!

Saturday, 16 September 2017 14:16
lb_lee: A picture of Sneak smiling (sneak)
[personal profile] lb_lee
Hey guys, did you love the gorgeous textures and typography for our covers of the Homeless Year and Alter Boys In Love?  Awesome news, the designer friend who did those is now selling awesome queer disability pride shirts!  We're planning on buying the purple one with the pink 'disability pride' letters.

Also there's a sale going for about nine more hours, so snatch one on the cheap!

Woo, T-shirts!

--Sneak and Mori

Back from Texas!

Wednesday, 13 September 2017 14:29
lb_lee: Miranda saying "REALITY" with airquotes. (realitylolz)
[personal profile] lb_lee
Hello all!  As you can see, we've returned from our trip, and it wasn't as bad as Mori feared.  We're rather tired, but I'll give the quick sum-up!
  • The con went very well.  The entire trip cost us less than thirty dollars, thanks to Rogan selling well.  Huzzah!
  • We took all the photographs we needed of our childhood neighborhood, and I daresay we are now prepared for future comics set there.  Well done, dears! (However, we did not get to visit Candle Cave.  That's all right, Biff got a good hike, and regardless, we went in presuming it would be a bonus, not a given.)
  • We got to see some people of our past, including a couple high school friends, and Dr. Drag. (Dr. Drag was our first therapist, though we have not had that sort of relationship in years.  She has mentions on this blog, probably buried under the 'therapy' tag.) Their generosity allowed us to make this trip, and we are very grateful.
  • Rogan finished Alter Boys In Love, but due to the printer's website being broken on Mozilla and some truly peculiar requests regarding our formatting, we have not managed to finish the order.  We hope to complete that today.
  • Due to the intense work schedule, and the emotional challenge of returning to our hometown, Rogan has been worn out.  He will not be fronting for a bit, and Mori, Biff, Sneak, and I will manage things until he has rested up.

Thank you for your patience!
--Miranda

(no subject)

Sunday, 10 September 2017 16:24
octomantra: (Default)
[personal profile] octomantra
 So I’m in the middle of a breakdown right now, for lack of a better word…only this time it is a slow descent that I’m allowing to happen. It is not ideal by any means, but I’m accepting it.

There is a book on alchemy that I read several months ago that says something about depression, and lately it has been making a lot of sense:

“We are carried downward whenever we feel ourselves losing control. Anything that makes us feel helpless will get us there—illness, depression, grief, addiction, shame, rage, anxiety, PMS. In vertical terms, to be helpless is to be heavy. Surrendering makes the downward journey swifter and a tad less painful, but gravity is going to take you down whether you choose to surrender or not. No matter how hard you struggle, eventually you have to acknowledge your helplessness…Just like going down, getting back up to the horizontal after you’ve been below requires no instruction, no technique. Conscious attempts to employ levity don’t work.”

Essentially the internal alchemical process requires some periods of existential depression as a necessary step rather than as a sign of failure. It is usually a symptom of calcination. In an unexpected way, thinking about this is providing a strange form of comfort to me, because I have been inclined to try and actively get rid of the negative thoughts I have. This time, it seems almost natural to simply sit with those thoughts rather than judge or fight against them. I’ve been disconnecting from a lot of my commitments because I can’t pretend to be fully functioning anymore. And I’m okay with that, because I’m fairly certain that this is what I need to get better. I will return to the world when I’m ready. This is very different from how I felt during the first major breakdown I experienced many years ago, where all I could think about was “Something is wrong with me” or “I’m crazy.” It’s interesting that this new depressive episode is happening soon after I started CBT. I had a little bit of a conniption the other day, and I basically told some people to fuck off because I can’t stand to be drained by them anymore. I felt bad afterward, but it was necessary. 

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